Do you catch yourself saying negative things to yourself often?
“I can’t do this”
“I’m not good enough”
“Nothing I do works”
If so, you may be caught in a loop of negative self-talk that’s destroying your confidence and setting yourself up to fail. That’s no way to go about your life!
As a hypnotherapist, I help people rewire their subconscious belief system so they can easily stop automatic negative thought patterns, increase their confidence, improve their self talk, and get rid of fears that may be keeping them stuck.
To help you, I’m going to share an effective method for how to stop negative self-talk below.
You may have heard the famous Henry Ford quote “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right”.
I love this quote so much because it’s 100% true.
If you think you can’t do something, there’s a huge possibility that you won’t do it and you probably won’t even try!
Thankfully, the opposite is true as well.
If you think you CAN do something, you likely will do it…and you’ll do it well. You’ll also feel self-motivated and excited to succeed.
It all starts with reframing negative thoughts into POSITIVE thoughts. Even if you don’t believe them at first, the BELIEF will come. And that is when magic happens in your life.
It’s very important to stop your negative thinking because what you think about yourself and your abilities affects your life in a big way…
Negative self-talk increases anxiety and a depressed mental state. You’re telling yourself that you suck…and eventually you’re going to believe it.
You’ll be filled with negative energy, and won’t be able to attract opportunities into your life. Great opportunities might be right in front of your face, but you won’t be able to see them!
Thinking negatively also leads to low self-esteem and a tendency towards perfectionism. You may find yourself thinking that unless something is perfect, it isn’t worth doing. This keeps you stuck and you’ll have zero motivation to do anything that will move you forward.
Once you get used to thinking negatively about yourself, it becomes habitual. This makes it hard to break free from it.
That’s what makes this simple 3-step method of stopping negative thoughts so powerful. It is easy to do – and the more you practice it, the more it will become a new positive habit for you.
How to stop negative self-talk with “Catch it, Check it, Change it” (the 3 C’s)
In 3 simple steps you will become more aware of your negative thoughts, you will examine them, and reframe them into positive thoughts. Honestly when I was first taught this method, I thought it was a bit ridiculous. It seemed far too simple to work. But I have tried it on myself, and let me tell you…just because it is simple doesn’t mean that it isn’t effective. I now believe that this is one of the most powerful ways to change negative thought patterns and have been sharing this with my clients who struggle with this.
Step 1: Catch It
You simply begin by noticing your thoughts. Become acutely aware of how you talk to yourself. Each and every time you have a thought that makes you feel sad or another negative emotion, these are the thoughts that you want to really take note of.
Start noticing the next time you feel sad or anxious about something, and listen to what you are saying to yourself. These negative feelings are great cues for when you need to stop and listen to your thoughts.
This is what it means to Catch It!
Bonus exercise: It can be helpful to keep a journal of these thoughts at first. You can use a simple notebook, and start jotting down your self-talk along with the time and the emotion that you were experiencing at the time. You will likely start to see some patterns that will be helpful in the next two steps.
Step 2: Check It
Now it’s time to examine those negative thoughts. This helps you interpret your thoughts differently and gives you a more balanced view.
Ask yourself:
- Is it true?
- Am I blowing this out of proportion?
- Is there any evidence that contradicts it?
- Is this something that a good parent would say to their child?
- Would my (close friend/family member) think this was true?
More often than not, you will find that your negative thoughts are not valid! This helps to give yourself permission to stop believing these thoughts about yourself. You may find it hard to be objective about your own negative self-talk at first, but this gets MUCH EASIER the more you practice it!
Step 3: Change It
This is where you reframe that negative self-talk into positive self-talk. As I mentioned previously, you may not believe it at first and that is okay! Eventually, you will.
Now that you have tested the validity of a negative thought and found that it’s not as close to reality as you originally believed it was, you can now turn it into something positive, motivating, and uplifting!
You should be realistic too. Perhaps you will need to add a reason to your thought that will make it more believable.
This is as simple as taking the negative thought “I can’t do this” to “I can do this with the proper training”.
You have reframed the thought into a positive one, and added a reason why you can do it (ie. proper training). Now you are looking at the situation more realistically and positively at the same time!
Here’s real-life example of how to Catch it, Check it, and Change it:
Let’s pretend that you’re having negative thoughts at work about your performance. Your boss brings to your attention that you made a mistake on a project. This makes you feel stressed, anxious, and worried.
CATCH IT:
You notice that you’re feeling anxious and that you have the automatic thought:
“I’m horrible at my job and I’m going to get fired.”
You have now identified a negative thought, and you log it down.
CHECK IT:
Now you challenge that negative thought to see if it’s reality. You ask yourself:
- Am I really horrible at my job?
- Are there times I do a good job?
- Did my boss threaten to fire me?
- I’m I conflating getting fired to making one or two mistakes?
- Am I blowing this totally out of proportion?
- Do most people make mistakes from time to time?
After examining your thought, you realize that you are good at your job most of the time, everyone makes mistakes, and that it is very unlikely that you’ll lose your job.
CHANGE IT:
Now you have the opportunity to transform this thought into a positive one. This could look something like this:
“I have done a good job on projects before, and I will continue doing so.”
“I’m doing an excellent job at work, and I’ve learned from this mistake so I won’t make it again.”
These are a couple good, constructive thoughts that will propel you forward. In this example, even if you don’t immediately believe that you’re doing an excellent job, the simple act of thinking this way will start changing your beliefs about yourself–which will ultimately change your behavior! You will actually start doing a better job when you believe that this is who you are.
I want to help you believe that you are the person that you want to be.
Hypnotherapy is a very effective tool to help you change automatic thoughts in your subconscious mind, making this process so much easier for you. It helps you increase your belief in yourself so you have higher self-esteem and confidence, while getting rid of fears that are keeping you stuck.
If you suffer from negative self-talk, low self-esteem, and anxiety, I invite you to set up a free consult call with me.
We will discuss how hypnotherapy can help you and what hypnosis really is (which will probably surprise you!). You can finally break through sabotaging thoughts and start living the life you want to!
Book a call with me to stop your negative self-talk here now.
My best to you,
Pam
